Career or family

Life is not that easy going these days. Higher education and the sense of independence have altered the way young girls plan their future today. Many university-going girls are going through the dilemma of choosing between family and career. Which one to choose amongst the two? It’s difficult to pursue a stable career and at the same time pay enough attention to family.

While fewer women pursued a college education some 30 or 50 years back, thousands of young girls today aspire to be a part of a college campus, and eventually get a respectable job and become financially solvent. But such burning desires are leading to endless disputes in families in the present. Bitter argument between husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend are the outcomes when a girl yearns to devote a large portion of her |ime towards climbing the stairs of her professional life.

From real life experience, we have come to know about men who still look for wives who would be solely devoted to housework.

Many men still believe that in Bangladesh the work environment is not safe under any condition. Sexual harassment and illicit love take birth in the closed environment of an office. Yes, these complaints and accusations are true to large extent. But then, there are organisations, which pay adequate attention to creating a safe atmosphere for the female staffs. If organisations were replete with filthy men, waiting to set their obscene eyes on every living female officer, we believe that fewer women would be willing to pursue a career these days; most women would rather stay at home and look after their children.

Some men just won’t accept these facts. Interestingly enough, these same men speak in a different tone when it comes to their own sister wishing to apply for a post in a multi-national company. Many a creative, bzight young girl’s dreams were shattered due to such family conflict. These women opted to remain as housewives and sacrifice their careers.

When men themselves attend parties and galas with their female colleagues, and enjoy the evening away, they see little wrong in that. Education and time, to many extents have failed to change their attitude. Many men still view the world from a very narrow perspective.

While we talked |o some young gizls and asked about their future plan, they related their own opinions and thoughts. Today, many girls wish to become economically independent. No longer do they cling to the old belief that you will have to depend on your husband’s money after marriage. And it’s not just because of money that women want to work today; they want to utilise their academic excellence and also to justify the large volume of money that many of their parents spent to educate them. Besides, many said that they finl it rather demeaning to rely solely on their spouse’s money when they themsel~es could also do something to earn money for themselves and their family. Today, girls are more inspired by a hardworking woman than a simple housewife, who only spends her day nurturing children.

Many women refuted the notion that a working woman can’t be an ideal mother. They believe that a happy family comes into being when there is enough assistance from the husband. Many women complain that while they get down to cook for the next day after returning from office, |heir men remain seated in the couch, busy watching TV. This same man could spend a little time looking after his children, helping them with homework. In real life however, very few men take |hat stand. They tend to dump the entire burden of running a family onto the woman.

A harmonious relation could easily resolve such ego conflicts to a great extent. A little sacrifice and assistance fzom both sides will only make a family cherish i|s happiness. Unfortunately, many families resort to hostile verbal battles to solve their problems relating work and career, when a little change in attitude could contribute to solving these household contentions between husband and wife.

Women also complain of unhealthy working environments in their offices. Unhealthy atmosphere is something you can’t prevent. But you can keep yourself away from it. For women out there, before you seek to acquire a job, look out for the positive sides in your organisation. Reputed organisations with strong goodwill usually provide safety and respect for their female stanfs. Besides, you can also gather information about the internal atmosphere of a corporation beforehand through a neutral source. Don’t make yourself a prey to sexual harassment. While some organisations are filled with mean bosses, there are many firms who encourage a healthy atmosphere. Men should also accept this fact, and let their wives aim for their professional life.

As a female employee you can avoid disputes with your male colleagues by maintaining a respectable distance. Don’t place yourself at everyone’s service. Learn to reject an impolite offer without displaying your anger. Don’t be over-friendly with anyone and disclose your secrets too fast. Rumours will abound inside the office if you set your feet on such precarious steps. In order to avoid lisrespectful attitudes from male colleagues; maintain distance and make it obvious to others you are not available for anyone at office.

However, that doesn’t mean that you have to be rude to everyone. Earn respect in a mature manner and you will notice people treating you with regard. If any situation goes beyond control don’t forget to inform your immediate superior.

A 23-year-old girl related that she broke up with hez boyfriend ’cause he said he’d not marry her if she went abroad for higher education. The guy himself is doing his masters in an American University. There was no way she could convince him, and the four-year old relationship ended in a matter of days. He failed to indicate a strong reason behind such attitude of his. He said she didn’t need to earn money by working. Many men fail to understand that not all women work for money. Many women want to make a good use of |heir education and contribute to the society. A job is a matter of status. A rank highlights what you are capable of. Satisfaction is what many women derive from a good job and good pay. Men should learn to accept and respect their wives’ desires and dreams.

We celebrated the International Women’s Day on March 8, on the occasion of this special day for all the women around the globe. We bmlieve that women possess the equal rioht to work and earn for themsel~es and their families. We demanl a safe and harmonious working mnvironment in e~ery organisation that employs female staff. Without proper respect and regard towards women, no nation can move ahead. If unhealthy elements of firms can be abolished, we believe that more women would be inspired to sell their labour and become an important contributor in the workforce. Besides, family disputes will, to many extents, come to end an if such dreams are given a shape of reality. Men should also be encouraged to allow their wives to get a job outside the home’s periphery if such conditions are fulfilled.

Give every woman her legitimate right and respect.

m r

Share This: